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Thursday, 22 March 2012

Revolution- Part I

Things to be sorted out were all I'd kept in the pending zone of my mind, a number of days before and after I turned nineteen. I called my meet with N a break I probably needed but its too soon to call it a break and to give myself one in the first place.

My meet with N, the time we spent together in a complete different place, perhaps, was nameless. Without any label. And maybe, I truly hope, maybe, the very anonymity of it was what I needed to occupy the meantime. The meantime when there were huge possibilities of me doing the unnecessary and getting myself stuck in yet another mess.

There lay gladness in me initially. Gladness of knowing I'm still capable enough to be flexible and let things happen as they do, take life as it comes. To accept the unacceptable and rearrange the could-have-been-broken parts. To deny the guilt and hatred and define change in a new way. It was a little hard to know the gladness lay somewhere inside due to the presence of confusion, numbness and a tiny bit of disappointment, since I'm a human, regarding some things.

I remember I'd intentionally kept myself distant from some things and wondered later if I was keeping it real, knowing that I wasn't. The state I've come to be in now is more or less similar. I'm distant, yes, but from the past. I've let go. I'm still letting go. Of oldness, of labelled people and moments. I'm letting go of all those so much that I'll someday be empty. I, perhaps, already am. So empty that there's enough space for some more emptiness.

But who cares? Who cares, as long as I'm happy. As long as I wake up and see the life around me as beautifully as I can..

28 comments:

  1. N for nostalgia...Well done!:-)

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  2. :-) A good pleasant read....Good job..

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  3. Hi congrates on turning Nineteen but your way of writing speaks about much higher than ur age. Really appreciate ur writings.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you.. Oh, I guess it does.

      Thank you very much..! :)

      Delete
  4. Aww congratulations! cute blog, beeteedubbs :)

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  5. As long as you're happy to be the person that you are its all good. :*
    and whoa , you're older. I'm only seventeen. Sigh. :(
    *tight teddy bear hug* Be good.

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    Replies
    1. That's what.
      And yes, I am older than you. :) I thought you were. :P

      Thank you for your words.. :)

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  6. must say too good... ur writing reflect ur ati, iguess

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  7. I just happened to stumble upon your blog and i am loving it already!! Girl, you have a way with words which is really, really impressive!! :)
    Coming to the post, wow!! :) Does it say it all? Happy Birthday! [Belated] Congrats on turning 19 girl! And well, as long as one is happy, anything works! :)

    P.S. --- New Post on my blog too Cherie! <3 Make sure you take out time and give it a look. I'd really appreciate that! Once again -- Lovely blog-post! :) If you find it interesting then maybe we could follow each other? I would love that! :)

    Xoxo.
    Surabhi.

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    Replies
    1. This bunch of words has definitely made my day! I'm really glad you liked it here.. I'm very thankful!
      Thank you for your wishes and these words.. :) :)

      Sure will I visit you. :)

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  8. So good to see your photograph on the profile...certainly the blog helped me move forward.

    Been a long time since I read you, or anyone for that matter and it seems, you echo my thoughts here....

    Abstracts are soothing...

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    1. You must be knowing your feedback does mean a lot me, right? <3

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  9. I came over to you blog accidently... But the time i spent over here was totally worth it...
    Loved the picture.. and yeah congrats on turning 19... you are coming to an end of your 'teens' so enjoy..
    Keep writing because i'll keep coming back :)
    Happy Blogging :)

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    Replies
    1. I'm so so glad you liked it here. Thank you so much.. :)

      Yes, enjoying late teen years!

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  10. Such a beautiful post :)

    Btw, I updated my links, take a look ;)

    Love
    /S / http:// mydarlingsolitude.blogspot.com

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  11. You are only 19? Hard to believe. Superb writing again. I'm your fan already. A friend told about your blog. I'm glad that I found you. :) :)

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    1. Yes, I am 19! Thank you so much for stopping by and the feedback. :)

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  12. worth reading..is it wrong that i have read part 3 first?

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    1. No, its not. Reading from the 1st part would be more sequential. Its up to you. Thank you! :)

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  13. You know, i am going to print out the entire series, of Revolution. and put it my "most favorite folder"
    It is soul-stirring, you know! I d love to lie on my bed, have coffee in one hand.. and then those sheets. Of these beautiful words you hitched together.
    I have Zeba, Crysty and some posts frm Serendipity! :) You will be my new new addiction!

    Too late, i know But belated happy bday! Miss 19 ! :) Also, u are VERY VERY pretty! :)

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    Replies
    1. You made my days and nights by this comment, Twisha!
      I really am speechless and I had to read this for over ten times to actually believe it. You're now one of those who encourage and support me regarding what I write. I'm thankful but can't thank you..its inappropriate.
      Thank you for the wish! :) And okay I'll believe the latter at least today! :)

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Let the soul in you speak. :)

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