Bonds

I do not remember by whom but I've been told to learn from my own mistakes. I don't remember the speaker, but I've been comforted and told it's okay to make mistakes in the first place.

Some flashbacks are meant to recur. But I am having trouble with recalling everything that I was once surrounded by. The most I can remember is the days I tried to speak to brother and that one evening when I actually did speak with him.

Monsoon had just started. It would rain once or twice a week or sometimes every day. Somewhere during the time when it rained, I'd be quiet from the inside for I knew I wasn't getting drenched like I always do. Somewhere I'd know why rain failed to brighten me up like that star shining from within residing beside the moon. I would just get wet instead.
That's all I remember. My convincing myself of the capability when brother was about to leave. "It's over", I started, "I just wanted to let you know that." And I discovered some energy taking place just right then because it was the truth that I spoke. Because I was being honest.

He asked for the reason and I refused to tell him that. Regardless of my expectations thereafter, what I received was a smile. That simple and pure smile you rarely get to see. And that's when I realized, I was back.

He left the topic there and then. Because such is he. Because he understands without saying he does. This is one of those many and uncountable things because of which I feel nobody deserves him. My brother. He is that real.